Just a Quick update

I'm blogging with this mobile blogging thingy from my phone, so bare with me if the post comes out all weird or something...K? :)

So I am now a Miami resident. I am even thinking of changing the address on my driver's license, that makes me really nervous! The address on my license has been the same since I was 16...I guess in my mind it makes my move permanent. These past two weeks have been interesting to say the least.

The boo and I are trying rekindle our romance, so to speak, we have been broken up for two months. Haven't felt like talking about that situation at all, it made me extremely sad :-/. But now that we're in the same city, he seems to be making the effort. I care deeply for him, so I hope we get it together. He keeps making plans for us, but I'm hesitant because I'm scared. Matters of the heart are SO scary! Ugh (<---Dang, I didn't mean to write that much about him)

I have family drama out the wazoo! Ugh! So glad to be out back on my own again! I am not meant to live with anyone else. I walk around nakeed constantly and I LOVE it!!! Lol

I like my new office. Its smaller but more intimate, so I like it.I love the area that I live in. Its not the city part and I like it that way.

I'll elaborate more in a few days.

*Miami folk are so different and interesting, lol

My prayer: Lord please help me to make the most of this opportunity!

I Got an APARTMENT!!!! :)

I just got word this morning that I was approved for my apartment!

That was my biggest worry as far as my move is concerned. Now that I know where I'm going to live, I just need to figure how I'm gonna get my stuff down to Miami :). I absolutely hate moving! Every time I had to move in college, it just made me want to throw everything away and start over.

But moving is good way to purge though. I throw a lot of things away simply because I don't feel like packing it. The homeless shelter usually makes out good with all the clothes and shoes, lol.

Winning the Lottery right now would be the greatest thing ever! lol.

I'm going through this phase where I feel like changing my phone number. Just start fresh with my new move and only inform those that really need to know. I've had my current phone number since my freshman year in college, 7 years, and I just feel like a change. I also want to cut all my hair off and just start over, natural though. I've never even given going natural any serious thought.

Can I really go Natural?!?!? :-/

I don't know what I'm going through, maybe it's the move.

Prayers would be appreciated, for those of you that pray. Truth be told, I'm scared sh!tless about this move. I have tons of friends from college down there and one of my best friends, but I'm scared of the unknown. On the flip side, I'm ridiculously excited about the possibilities. Is that weird?

I'll be back to let you guys in on the personal side. Haven't done one of those posts in a minute. Hope everyone's doing great! :)

Remember When....

I said, if I lived in Miami I wouldn't take life seriously? Well it looks like I'm going to get my chance to not take life seriously!!! :) I'm so excited! :)

A few weeks ago, I noticed that a position opened up in my department down in Miami and I went to talk to my Bureau Chief about it. I let him know my interest. He basically let me know that they were just moving some people around, but they were still obligated to post the position. But he let me know that my same position would be open in Miami and it would also set me up to move up faster. I told him cool, I'll take it!

This spur of the moment decision is SO not me! But I felt that I needed to take that chance and go for it. So my boss informed me last week that if I wanted the position it was mine.

I'm so excited, scared, apprehensive...everything! I've been searching for apartments like crazy. It's so hard :-/. I want to live in a good area that's affordable.

So yea, I'm moving to Miami and I can't believe I'm actually taking this jump.

Wish me luck! :)

So much drama in the ORL :-/

So much going on in my world right now...I feel so overwhelmed.

*My family members seem to think I'm an extension of B.ank of America, W.achovia or some kind of bank. I just don't get it. I seem to be the first line of help when someone in my family needs something. I'm 'bout to start telling their asse$ NO! It might even be a hell NO. I'm trying to get myself on my feet and I can't do that when everyone thinks I'm their personal bank.

*And that leads me to this...I hate when people ask me for stuff like I owe them something. If you're going to ask me for something, then ask. But don't come to me EXPECTING to get it. I don't even feel like I owe anything to even my father. And my mother has gone to heaven so the only person I really owe anything to is God.

*A pet peeve of mine is men who don't get up for elderly women or women with children on the bus. Seriously, WTF? Have you no manners? A lady got on the bus the other afternoon with her young daughter and there was at least 3 men sitting in the front and not one of those idiots stood up to give her their seat! When the bus pulled forward she damn near fell over with her daughter in her arms. And finally one of the idiots decided to give her a seat! UGH!

*Ok, so I think this love sh!t is for the birds. Seriously, relationships are hard as hell. And men try to perpetrate like they're not emotional beings, but they so are! It's ridiculous. I will admit that I was so used to dating nonchalant men, so this in turn has made me very nonchalant and guarded. I just really did not want to get hurt. But I say what the hey and opened myself up to my current honey and now his @ss is acting up! I don't know, I'm not one to give up easily but there is only so much one can take. The same thing you did to get me, should be the same thing you do to keep me. Consistency is the key. Men can you tell me why you guys are such big babies? LOL (seriously thought)

*Ummm, if you're stomach hangs over your pants you should not be wearing midriff shirts. I swear if I see one more case of this foolishness I am going to scream. I don't know what is up with the Orlando women, but they seem to think it's cute to have their stomach out. Despite the gun shot wounds, stretch marks, dimples etc. It's gross and a bit disheartening.

*I absolutely hate this H.alle B.erry song by H.urricane Chris. He looks like a gremlin! And his black @ss lips don't make it any better. I can't stand weed lips. EWWW.

*Someone must have put a message out that I was having trouble in paradise. I've been getting calls and emails from EX's since last week. It's kind of annoying. I don't know why my ex's think that just because they've contacted me, I'm going to jump out of my skin with joy. NOT.GONNA.HAPPEN. Eww, there's a reason you're an ex.

My prayer: Lord, please give me strength and peace of mind, because I can't shoulder everyone else's problems by myself.

Is it weird...

That I don't want anyone that I know to read this blog. I kind of feel like this is my mental sanctuary. Only one of my best friends has the url for this blog.

A girl I went to high school with sent me an invitation to Twitter. I guess she's just getting hype to twitter. I've been on twitter since last summer, I think. I followed her without first thinking of the consequences. Now I feel bad if I unfollow her, because that's gonna seem shady. No?

I had the link to my blog on my twitter page. I took that down.

I feel like I don't really anything in common with the people I went to high school with, mainly the ones that didn't go off to college.

UGH! Dilemma!

I'm mad at myself.

Man I want to take her off! LOL. I'm wacky, I already know.

Ah well, such is life.

Trips, girls and strong personalities...oh my!

Ok, so my best friends are on schedule to go to Chicago next month for the Taste of Chicago Festival.

*side note* In high school I had three best friends. The four of us hung tight. Two went to an HBCU and me and the other friend went to our PWI (Go Gators! lol). One of my friends from the HBCU moved to Chicago after graduation. The other one stayed in the town where she went to college after graduation to work. The best friend who went to college with me, left and went back home after she got pregnant.

We haven't had a girls weekend with the four of us since junior year in undergrad. Our weekends have never been without craziness. Someone always gets mad at someone else. At least that's how it used to be. We all such strong personalities. Personally, I think I've toughened up because of them. I used to be so passive and non-confrontational. But after we all became friends, in order to keep up with their snarky remarks I had to learn to have my comebacks lol.

A whole lot of stuff went down after my friend got pregnant. We all stopped talking to her, for our own totally different reasons. This all happened Spring 2006. DRAMA! If I were to give a back story on everything, it would take several posts. I'm exhausted just thinking of it. So let's just say it wasn't pretty.

My friend from back home and I started texting around last summer. Got re-acquainted (sort of). Once I moved back home last August, we slowly begin to communicate. Matter of fact, she put me on to the job that I currently have.

So my friend from Chicago and I were IM'ing at work a few weeks ago and were discussing me coming to Chicago for The Taste. Then she shocked the hell out of me and suggested that I invite our two other friends. I didn't know the reaction I would get from the other two, but surprisingly they were really receptive.

Today we booked our flight online. I think everyone's a little apprehensive about how well it will go. But I'm so optimistic. Maybe I'm being naive. Who knows? But I figure, we're all adults and we should be able to go on this trip and behave ourselves accordingly and handle anything that may arise as adults. We have so much fun together and know each other so well. We've all been through so much together and I know they're each gong to in my life for the long haul.

I figure I'm gonna pray (a whole lot) and do a couple hail Mary's (I'm not even Catholic, lol) and hope for the best. I feel like its' going to go well though. So pray for us! lol.

My prayer: Lawd, please help us to have a drama-free trip.

Man, WTH?!

Ok, I want to start this blog off by thanking God (don't I sound like a rapper accepting a BET award? Lol). But seriously I need to thank God because he just keeps on blessing me, despite my wayward ways!*I just looked at the title of my post and it doesn't match my gratitude! Lol

Ok, remember how I was talking about my brother knocking up some chick in my last post? (Of course you don't). So it turns out, he was covering up for his girl cousin, my stepmom's (his mom)niece. Turns out this 'lil heifa got pregnant and didn't tell anyone. The 'lil heifa got sick at school one day and my stepmom and her dad went to pick her up and took her to the hospital. They get to the hospital and the doctor announces "We should have a baby very shortly". My stepmom and her brother were looking around like "WTF, what baby?". Needless to say everyone was in shock.

And you know what, this mess pisses me off! These little kids think babies are toys! They just think they're gonna have a baby and all is gonna be well with the world! What the hell would possess this 'lil heifa to get pregnant and not tell anyone? Not only did she not get any prenatal care, she has no job and no means to take care of a child. So you know who the responsibilty falls on, that's right her daddy.

I just turned 26 last week and I'm still not ready to be a mommy. I watch my nephew sometimes and I'm ready to send him back to whence he came after a couple hours. This 20 and under generation baffle me. They have no sense of responsibility. Hell, they don't have common sense for that matter. Can you tell I'm mad?!

I originally planned to talk about my boo and my fun weekend, but I thought of that situation and got mad. Ah well, cet la vie.

Next time I'll be more pleasant, promise :)

Men...

Who knew that guys could be so moody?!

How is a guy more moody than me and I'M the one on the rag! UGH!

Still recovering from my trip to Miami this weekend. Got to see the boo and spent some QT together. Good times....

I'm taking a mental break today....cuz I'm T-I-RED!

B.lame it on the a.lcohol?...NAW, b.lame it on lack of good sense.

I may or may not have to break this post up into two different posts....depending on the amount of stuff.

Let's first turn our attention to my 'lil sis. To say I was heartbroken and disappointed would be an understatement. My middle sister called me and asked me if I had talked to our baby sis. I said "No, did something happen?". She proceeds by saying "E is pregnant". I swear I could hear my heart beating out loud. I told her I would call her back and called my baby sis. Of course her butt didn't pick up cuz I'm sure she thought I was gonna cuss at her.

Side note:I've become like the mother in my family, since my mom passed, as far as my siblings are concerned. They have no problem sharing good news with me. But when they do something that they know I'm not gonna approve of, I have to find out about it through another sibling.

So I sent her a text telling her that I wasn't mad at her and that I just wanted to talk to her. And whadaya know, she calls me back. So we're conversing and I ask her what she plans on doing. You would have thought I had asked the dumbest question known to man. She says "I'm gonna keep it, what do mean?" Ummm lets see, you're 18, your boyfriend is 21 with 3 babies already, you have a job that barely supports you let alone you AND a baby. And she's attending community college. I, in no way advocate ab0rtions but sometimes you have to see the situation for what it is. My sister is ridiculously smart and has so much going for herself. I went on to tell her that a baby is not a toy and how did she plan on taking care of this baby. Of course she didn't have definitive answer. All she knew was that she was going to make it work and she wasn't going to drop out of school.

After that, all I could do was let her know that I was there for her and that I would try to help her in any way that I can.

In some strange way, I feel like I failed my mother. My 'lil sis is my mom's baby. I couldn't get through to my other sister and my brother, but my 'lil sis seemed to get it. She excelled in school. Although she did get into trouble here and there, she always made her education her priority. I don't know, the whole situation just frustrates me *sigh*.

OK, on to my brother. He and I have the same father. So my brother comes into my room in couple weeks ago and told me he needed to talk to me and I say OK. He then tells me, that he has a baby on the way and that I can't tell anyone. After hearing about my sister, I was sure this was a joke. So my surprise quickly turned to anger, because I'm always preaching to my brother about wearing c0ndoms. His excuse was this was some girl he's knows since elementary school and they trust each other...yada yada yada. But they're not in a relationship though. WTF?! He was saying how he was trying to convince the girl to have an ab0rtion but she was leaning towards keeping the baby. He's a senior in high school and she's a junior.

So I asked him how he planned to provide for this child. This fool said "I'm gonna get a job". Like that's just the answer to everything. Anyone who knows anything about my little brother, knows that he is the laziest mofo ever to walk this earth. Hell, he even admits that he's lazy. He quit a job at Hardees after a couple weeks because they asked him to take out the trash!! So how is someone who doesn't like to work, still throws b1tch fits when he doesn't get what he want, has no inkling of the value of money supposed to provide for a child?

Someone please enlighten me, PLEASE!

UGH!! I'm annoyed!

My prayer: Lord, please help to speak out of love! Cuz if I say what I really think...boy!

I been gone for a minute...now I'm back with the jump-off :)

I'm always messing up the words to a song, so those words in the title might be wrong...don't judge me! ;)

I've missed blogging. But I seem to have no real energy to do it. Must be my full-time job!!! lol Thank God for that.

New job...still getting to know my new boo...family drama...my 18 year-old sister is pregnant :/....then turn around to find out my 18 year-old brother (on my dad's side) knocked up some chick...just a bunch of mess.

I'll update on the happenings by the beginning of next week. Hope everyone's doing well.

Oh, and I miss Mike and his tomfoolery!